For some reason (or for lots of reasons, more likely) I am feeling extremely overwhelmed with life right now. I don't feel like it is necessarily a bad thing, just a season that I am going through. Some days it is all I can do to make a path through the clutter, both mentally and physically, and do the bare minimum of what needs to be done. My kids are loved on and taken care of, my house not so much. I find the former more important anyway so it works out ;) Since Maya was born, I've had guilt that I should be doing more and being more when it came to motherhood, marriage, homemaking. I beat myself up that I should play instead of clean, and then feel guilty because the dishes aren't done or that pile that I started to sweep in the kitchen stayed there for FIVE DAYS (true story) or Michael runs out of socks or it's 7pm and I haven't even thought of what we would have for dinner so we eat spaghetti again (I am seriously fortunate that my family likes spaghetti ~ and I'm talking a box of pasta and a jar of sauce, *maybe* some frozen meatballs ~ because we have it at least 2x/week).
But, I'm starting to really believe that "babies don't keep" poem that I see quoted on other blogs and facebook so frequently. Milo is almost 5 months old and I can't even believe that the time has gone so fast. My one regret from the short time that we've had together is that I've stressed so much about what I should be doing instead of just enjoying his sweet baby scent, how his hair sticks up after a bath, the way he kicks just right so that jammies don't stay on properly. Part of me wants to keep him little forever, but a larger part wants to just soak this all in and enjoy every little milestone as it comes. After watching a friend work *so hard* with her son to meet milestones that come naturally for some babies, I really feel blessed and in awe each time Milo grabs for a toy or rolls over or scrunches up his face so hard to make a sound. So, as much as I am overwhelmed, I am blessed beyond measure.
Song for a Fifth Child
Mother, oh Mother, come shake out your cloth,
Empty the dustpan, poison the moth,
Hang out the washing and butter the bread,
Sew on a button and make up a bed.
Where is the mother whose house is so shocking?
She’s up in the nursery, blissfully rocking.
Oh, I’ve grown shiftless as Little Boy Blue
(Lullaby, rockaby, lullaby loo).
Dishes are waiting and bills are past due
(Pat-a-cake, darling, and peek, peekaboo).
The shopping’s not done and there’s nothing for stew
And out in the yard there’s a hullabaloo
But I’m playing Kanga and this is my Roo.
Look! Aren’t her eyes the most wonderful hue?
(Lullaby, rockaby, lullaby loo).
The cleaning and scrubbing will wait till tomorrow,
For children grow up, as I’ve learned to my sorrow.
So quiet down, cobwebs. Dust go to sleep.
I’m rocking my baby and babies don’t keep.
~Ruth Hulbert Hamilton
|Charlotte with "Holly" Pocket ~ neither girl will accept the fact that her name is Polly.|
|Charlotte made me dinner :)|
|First real snow!|
|My little ballerina :) She is *so proud* of her pointy toes :)|
|Saturday morning breakfast ~ yum!|
|Could she seriously be any sweeter???|
|The girls were having a snowball fight today with the last tiny bit of snow in the yard. Maya was so sad that it melted!|
|I think Charlotte's snowsuit is hilarious. I'm so glad it still fits this year :)|