A Dichotomy

As foster parents, two of the phrases we hear the most often are
"I could *never* do what you do! I'd get too attached!"
and
"They should not get their kids back!"
and often they're said by the same person
and always, they don't realize the dichotomy of the two
because when we claim to be pro-life
and we take away access to healthcare and education
and we picket abortion clinics
but then we refuse to stand in the gap, refuse to risk our own comfort and our own family's stability and our own hearts...

"but they can put their baby up for adoption!" we cry
but the list of families waiting for a healthy white newborn is much longer than the list of those willing to take a drug-addicted black or biracial premie
because people don't want to pay $20,000 for a child that is "damaged"

when access to affordable childcare and housing and food is stigmatized or taken away
and when parents have to choose between staying with their children and putting food on the table
and when there is public outcry to "take her kids away!" every time someone makes a poor decision
but there are no families left to take in the children that are already in the system...

"well they should have never had children if they couldn't afford it" we say
and we don't realize that it is in complete contrast to our "pro-life" stance
because if they never had the child they'd be called murderer
but if they do they'll be called irresponsible or immoral



and as i sit here falling more in love each day with a tiny baby who's mama chose to give him life but is not able to parent
and i contemplate what it will look like in 3 months or 6 months or 2 years when she is able
and we have to lovingly let him go, just like we have done before and before and before
and i try not to think about where he would be and who would be loving him if we had decided that we didn't want to get "too attached"

Harens Head West, Part 1

Part 1: Packing, Airplane

About 6 months ago, Penny (Michael's mom) did a teaching tour out west. A couple of her friends went with her and got to explore the national parks, and when she got home she started planning her next teaching tour with the idea that all the kids could go with her. After figuring out all the logistics, we packed up and headed west! While the idea of driving seemed fun at first, the reality that we'd likely spend 70-80 HOURS in the car over 2 weeks made us rethink the plan, and we found inexpensive airline tickets to make it an even more fun and exciting trip! We flew from Columbus to Las Vegas and then rented a car and drove from Las Vegas to Idaho Falls, then to Yellowstone, up to Bozeman, down through Salt Lake City to Bryce Canyon, over to Snow Canyon and then Zion, and finally back to Las Vegas. It was a whirlwind of a trip, adding nearly 2,000 miles to our rental car over nine days. The kids did much better than we could have even hoped. They did a fair amount of grumbling about the heat and their tired legs (but really, so did I!), but they trudged on and the payoff at the end of each hike was more than worth it.

I can't begin to thank Penny enough for conceiving of this trip and making it happen. It will be one of children's most beloved memories, I'm sure!

Michael decided early on that we were going to pack light. Like, very light. Like, everyone can take 2 outfits and we'll do laundry every other day light. We managed to do it, and boarded the plane with one personal-item-sized backpack each, no carryons or checked bags! We *did* take Milo's 5-point carseat, and at the last minute grabbed the snap-n-go stroller (which is actually designed for the infant bucket seat) from the back of the van to carry it so we wouldn't have to lug it through the airport. This turned out to be an excellent idea, and we were able to gate-check both the carseat and the stroller (for free). Highly recommended.

The kids did AMAZING on the plane. We thought for sure there would be at least one crying or panicking, but they were mostly just excited with a little bit of nervousness thrown in for good measure. It helped that the plane wasn't very full, so once the captain turned off the seatbelt sign they could move around a bit. Milo took that opportunity to change seats approximately 13 times in the 4 hour flight. About an hour or so in, there was some severe turbulence; since the kids have no frame of reference for what an airplane is supposed to feel like, they were pretty unfazed, but it had Michael and I giving each other sideways glances. I was praying quietly for a calm spirit for myself and the kids, while a lady in the back of the plane started crying out LOUDLY to Jesus to stop the wind. All told it lasted about 20 minutes, and fortunately the rest of the flight was relatively smooth.

Our flight was very late (left Columbus after 9pm), so we were all very tired and ready for some sleep by the end, but seeing Las Vegas all lit-up at night from above was really neat. We got off the plane, waited at the gate for the carseat and stroller, got our rental car, and headed to the airport hotel to get a few hours of sleep before driving to Idaho Falls the next day...

Dusting off the Ol Blog

 Yikes! My poor, poor neglected blog!

This past weekend was a busy one! Arlo had her first basketball game on Saturday morning, and it was so fun to watch her! The game didn't go their way, but she was all smiles and excitement when it was over.  After her game, we drove to Logan to celebrate Christmas with Larry and Steph (Michael's dad and stepmom). I am grateful that my kids have so many loving grandparents! As soon as we walked in the kids were off, finding people to talk to and things to play with. When the food had been eaten and gifts opened, we drove back to Stow in time for Maya to sing in her choir concert. She had a solo in the last song of the evening, and she did great! Then church and soccer on Sunday, and back to the week! This weekend will be even more busy (and fun!) with movies and Christmas Eve church and snack dinner and Christmas morning and saying goodbye to Polka-Dot the elf for a whole year (praise the Lord! ;)).

We don't currently have any foster kiddos, and right now I'm not sure when we will take another placement. Lots of reasons, but that's for another post! :)

Pictures

She's Number 1!

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Nate showing Larry...something?

Santa's beard game is pretty weak this year

I promise this was the best one! Milo is still our wild card with pictures

Intense conversation

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Solo

Maya with her choir director, Mr. Kendall